When a child starts nursery, practitioners need more than a name, date of birth and emergency contact number. They need to understand the child as a person: what comforts them, how they communicate, what they enjoy, what they find difficult and what keeps them safe.
Parents sometimes worry about sharing too much or feel that small details are not important enough to mention. However, the information that seems ordinary at home can be extremely useful in an unfamiliar setting.
A child who calls their comfort blanket “baba”, refuses food when different items touch or becomes frightened by hand dryers may not yet be able to explain these things to a practitioner. A short conversation with the family can prevent distress and help staff respond more confidently.
This guide explains what parents should tell nursery before their child starts, what should be updated later and how families and practitioners can share information without turning every handover into a long meeting.
Start with your child’s normal routine
Nursery will have its own daily rhythm, but knowing what usually happens at home gives practitioners a useful starting point.
Tell the nursery about your child’s usual:
- Waking time
- Meal and snack times
- Nap times and typical nap length
- Milk feeds or bottles
- Nappy-changing pattern
- Toilet routine
- Bedtime, particularly if it affects daytime tiredness
This does not mean the nursery must reproduce the home routine exactly. In a group setting, meal times, outdoor play and activities need to work for several children. Babies may be able to follow a more individual pattern, while toddlers and preschool children gradually join a shared routine.
What matters is that practitioners understand what your child is accustomed to. If a baby normally sleeps at 10am but the nursery assumes they will wait until after lunch, the child may become exhausted before anyone recognises why.
Explain how flexible the routine is. A child who usually naps at noon may cope comfortably with a slightly different time. Another may struggle if sleep is delayed by even half an hour.
If you are changing a routine before nursery begins, tell the setting what you are working towards rather than describing the planned routine as though it is already established.
Explain how your child communicates
Young children communicate in many ways. Some use sentences, some use a few words, and others rely mainly on gestures, sounds, facial expressions or behaviour.
Tell practitioners how your child usually indicates that they are hungry, thirsty, tired, uncomfortable or in need of the toilet. Explain any family words that someone outside the home may not recognise.
For example, your child may use a shortened word for their cup, blanket, dummy, toilet or favourite toy. Writing down a few important words can help staff understand them during the first days.
You should also mention:
- Languages spoken at home
- Names used for close family members
- Signs or gestures your child uses
- Words they understand but do not yet say
- Pronunciation that may be difficult for unfamiliar adults to understand
- Any communication aids or visual supports
There is no need to stop using your home language because your child is starting an English-speaking nursery. Tell practitioners which language your child hears and uses most often, and share familiar words, songs or books that may help them feel secure.
If you have concerns about speech, hearing or understanding, discuss them openly. You do not need to wait for a formal diagnosis before telling the nursery what you have noticed.
Describe what comforts and unsettles your child
One of the most useful things a parent can explain is how their child responds when they are upset.
Tell the nursery whether your child is normally comforted by being held, sitting quietly beside an adult, listening to a particular song, looking at a book or having access to a familiar object.
If your child uses a dummy, blanket or soft toy, explain when they usually need it. Ask how the setting manages comfort items and whether they should be labelled or stored in a particular place.
Parents should also mention known fears and sensitivities. These might include:
- Loud or sudden noises
- Hand dryers or vacuum cleaners
- Dogs or other animals
- Messy textures
- Hair washing or water on the face
- Darkened rooms
- People in costumes
- Being approached too quickly
- Unexpected changes to routine
These details are not a list of demands. They help practitioners introduce experiences gradually and recognise why a child may react strongly in a situation that appears ordinary to somebody else.
If separation is already difficult, explain what normally happens when you leave your child with another trusted adult. Tell the nursery which goodbyes tend to help and which appear to make things harder.
Our guide to nursery separation anxiety explains why distress at drop-off can be normal and how it may change as a child becomes familiar with the setting.
Share health, allergy and medication information
The nursery must know about anything that could affect your child’s health or require a particular response.
Provide complete information about:
- Food, medicine, insect or environmental allergies
- Asthma or breathing difficulties
- Eczema and prescribed creams
- Seizures or febrile convulsions
- Diabetes or blood sugar concerns
- Previous serious illnesses or operations
- Regular medication
- Emergency medication
- Known reactions and warning signs
Do not write only “allergic to nuts” if the nursery needs more detail. Explain the type of nut where known, what reaction your child has experienced, how quickly it developed and what treatment has been prescribed.
The setting may need medication forms, an individual healthcare plan or instructions from a medical professional. Make sure medicines are supplied in their original packaging with the child’s name, dosage and pharmacy label where required by the nursery’s policy.
Tell staff about relevant medical devices, such as inhalers, auto-injectors, hearing aids or feeding equipment. Ask who will be trained to use them, where they will be stored and how they will remain accessible during outdoor play or trips.
Update the nursery whenever medication, dosage or medical advice changes. A verbal comment during a busy drop-off may not be enough for an important health update, so follow the setting’s formal process.
Discuss food, milk and mealtime needs
Food preferences are useful, but safety and dietary requirements must be clearly separated from ordinary likes and dislikes.
Tell nursery about:
- Diagnosed food allergies
- Food intolerances
- Religious or cultural dietary requirements
- Vegetarian or vegan diets
- Medical feeding plans
- Problems with chewing or swallowing
- Foods that present a particular choking risk for your child
- Current weaning stage
For a baby, explain whether they receive breast milk, formula or both. Provide information about bottle preparation, quantities, usual feeding times and any difficulties such as reflux.
If your child is weaning, describe the textures and foods they currently manage rather than simply saying they “eat everything”. A child may eat a wide range of purées but not yet be ready for larger pieces.
It is also helpful to mention strong preferences. A child who dislikes peas does not necessarily require a special menu, but a child who becomes distressed when foods touch may need sensitive support while becoming familiar with nursery meals.
Tell staff if your child has previously choked, has been assessed for feeding difficulties or is under the care of a dietitian or speech and language therapist.
If you are sending any food from home, check the nursery’s rules first. Many settings restrict particular products to protect children with allergies.
Explain sleep, nappies and toilet learning
Sleep and personal care are major parts of a young child’s day, particularly for babies and toddlers.
For sleep, tell nursery:
- When your child normally sleeps
- How long they usually sleep
- How they show that they are tired
- Whether they use a dummy or comfort item
- How they normally settle
- Whether they tend to wake distressed or content
- Whether there are medical or professional instructions affecting sleep
The nursery will follow its own safe-sleep policy, so it may not be able to copy every arrangement used at home. This is an opportunity to discuss differences rather than withhold information.
For nappies, mention the products your child normally uses, any creams prescribed or recommended, and whether they are prone to soreness. Tell practitioners if changes in your child’s bowel movements may indicate illness, constipation or another known problem.
If your child is beginning toilet learning, explain where they are in the process. Useful details include the words they use, how often they are prompted, whether they prefer a potty or toilet, and how they respond to accidents.
Try to describe what actually happens rather than what you hope will happen by the start date. Nursery staff can offer better support when they know that a child sometimes asks for the toilet but still needs regular reminders.
Pack enough spare clothing for accidents and label everything. Our nursery bag checklist covers practical items for different ages and routines.
Tell nursery about development and additional needs
Parents do not need to present a formal report on every area of development. However, practitioners should know about strengths, difficulties and any professional support already in place.
You may wish to discuss:
- Mobility and physical development
- Speech, language and understanding
- Hearing or vision
- Sensory sensitivities
- Attention and transitions
- Social interaction
- Emotional regulation
- Eating, sleep or toileting difficulties
Share relevant reports or recommendations from health visitors, speech and language therapists, physiotherapists, occupational therapists, paediatricians or other professionals. If your child has an education, health and care plan or is being assessed for one, tell the nursery early.
Do not feel that you must wait for a diagnosis. Parents often notice patterns before an assessment takes place. You can describe what you see without applying a label:
“She covers her ears and becomes very distressed in busy, echoing rooms.”
“He understands familiar routines but finds it difficult to follow spoken instructions without a gesture or picture.”
Specific examples are more useful than saying that a child is “difficult”, “behind” or “sensitive”. They help practitioners plan support and observe whether the same patterns occur at nursery.
Ask who the setting’s special educational needs coordinator is and how concerns are recorded, reviewed and discussed with families.
Share your child’s interests, personality and relationships
Nursery should know what makes your child happy as well as what they find difficult.
Tell practitioners about favourite:
- Books and songs
- Toys and types of play
- Animals, vehicles or characters
- Outdoor activities
- People and pets
- Family traditions
- Topics your child talks about repeatedly
These details can help a practitioner begin a relationship. A child who is reluctant to enter the room may respond when an adult remembers their interest in tractors or invites them to look at a familiar book.
Describe your child’s general temperament without turning it into a fixed label. Instead of saying “she is shy”, you might explain that she normally watches for a while before joining unfamiliar children. Instead of “he is naughty when tired”, explain that tiredness often leads to pushing, throwing or difficulty following instructions.
Tell nursery about significant relationships, including siblings, grandparents, step-parents, foster carers and other people the child talks about. Make sure practitioners know the names your child uses for them.
You can also share cultural traditions, celebrations and family practices that are important to your child. This helps the nursery reflect family life respectfully rather than making assumptions.
Explain family circumstances that may affect your child
Changes at home can affect sleep, behaviour, appetite and separation, even when a child does not appear to understand everything that is happening.
Tell nursery about circumstances that may influence your child’s day, such as:
- A new baby
- A house move
- Parents separating
- A change in contact arrangements
- Bereavement
- A family member being seriously ill
- A parent working away
- A recent hospital stay
- A major disruption to sleep or routine
You do not need to provide every private detail. Share enough for staff to understand what your child may be experiencing and how they should respond.
If there are legal arrangements concerning collection, parental responsibility or contact, speak directly to the manager. Provide relevant documentation where requested. Do not assume that an informal verbal instruction will be sufficient when the nursery has legal and safeguarding responsibilities.
Make sure the authorised collection list is accurate. Tell the setting how it should confirm the identity of somebody collecting for the first time and what it should do if an unexpected person arrives.
If there is information that should be handled particularly carefully, ask how it will be recorded and which staff members need access to it.
What should parents mention at daily handover?
Not every update requires a meeting. A short handover at the start of the day can give practitioners valuable context.
Tell staff if your child:
- Slept particularly badly
- Ate much less than usual
- Received medicine before arrival
- Had a minor injury at home
- Has been constipated or unwell
- Is worried about something
- Experienced an upsetting event
- Will be collected by a different authorised adult
- Needs to leave early for an appointment
A toddler who is unusually tearful may simply have been awake for several hours during the night. Without that information, staff must work out the cause while supporting the child.
Keep routine handovers brief when staff are welcoming several families. If an issue needs privacy or a longer discussion, ask for a telephone call or meeting.
Likewise, listen to what practitioners report at collection. Patterns become easier to recognise when information flows in both directions. A child refusing lunch at nursery and dinner at home may need a different response from a child who eats normally outside the setting.
How much information is too much?
Nurseries need relevant information, but they do not require every detail of family life.
Focus on what affects your child’s:
- Safety
- Health
- Care
- Communication
- Emotional wellbeing
- Ability to participate
- Collection arrangements
Important health and safeguarding information should be recorded through the nursery’s formal systems rather than left in an informal message or casual conversation.
Ask how personal information is stored, who can see it and how changes should be submitted. Parents should receive a privacy notice explaining how the nursery uses and protects information.
Avoid sending confidential medical or family details through an insecure social media message. Use the nursery’s approved email address, app, form or other agreed process.
If you are unsure whether something matters, mention it and allow the practitioner to decide whether it needs to be formally recorded. A short relevant detail is easier to manage than an unexplained situation later.
Frequently asked questions
Should I tell nursery that my child has never been left with anyone else?
Yes. This helps practitioners understand that separation and group care are entirely new experiences. It does not mean your child will necessarily find settling difficult, but the nursery can plan a gradual introduction and provide appropriate reassurance.
Should I mention a health concern if there is no diagnosis?
Yes. Describe what you have observed and any medical advice you have already received. The nursery should not diagnose your child, but practitioners can respond to known needs, record observations and discuss patterns with you.
Do I need to tell nursery about medicine given at home?
Tell staff if the medicine could affect your child during the nursery day or if it forms part of an ongoing treatment plan. This is especially important when dosage timing matters or when the medicine may mask a fever or other symptom.
Should nursery know that my child is having problems at home?
It is helpful to share changes or difficulties that may affect the child’s emotions or behaviour. You can keep the explanation brief and ask to speak privately with the manager or key person.
What if my child’s routine at home is inconsistent?
Be honest about the variation. Explain the most common pattern and what tends to happen after a late night, missed nap or different meal time. Nursery staff do not expect every family routine to be identical each day.
Should I tell nursery about my child’s difficult behaviour?
Yes, but describe the behaviour and its possible triggers rather than labelling the child. Explain what happens, when it tends to occur and which responses usually help.
Do I need to share information again if it was included on the registration form?
Important details should still be discussed with the child’s key person, particularly health needs, communication, comfort and routines. Forms provide a record, while conversation helps practitioners understand the context.
What if important information changes after my child starts?
Tell the nursery promptly. Medical information, medication, emergency contacts, authorised collectors and family circumstances should be kept current. Ask whether the update also needs to be provided in writing.
Can I ask nursery to keep family information confidential?
You can ask how the information will be handled and who needs to know it. The nursery should protect personal information, although staff may need to share concerns with appropriate people where safeguarding or legal duties apply.
What should I do if drop-offs are too rushed for a proper conversation?
Share the essential information briefly and ask for a call, meeting or secure message for anything more detailed. A busy entrance is not a suitable place to discuss confidential or complicated concerns.
Nursery staff do not expect parents to produce a perfect description of their child. They need honest, practical information that helps them provide safe and responsive care.
Begin with routines, communication, health, comfort and interests. Add details as they become relevant, and update the setting whenever something important changes.
Good information-sharing is not a one-time task completed before the first day. It is an ongoing conversation that helps home and nursery understand the child together. For more support with the early weeks, read our practical first-month nursery guide.
